Today I wanted to explore a subject that is controversial on some fronts, but I feel worthwhile to discuss. Today my friends and I were talking about the fantasy football weekend, when we got off subject for a minute. The discussion turned to a debate on what the role of coaches should be. Let me provide a little background. Last evening a winning high school coach addressed the school board and faculty here. He stated that it was not his responsibility to help his players go to college/their chosen paths in life, his job was to win football games. As an ex-player and coach, I took offense to that statement. As a player, my philosophy was that if I go out here and risk getting hurt/playing while hurt, this guy had better have my back. Do not get me wrong, I am not saying that the coach needs to be parent/disciplinarian, but I do feel that he has an obligation to take an interest in what his players want to do with themselves. Right or wrong, coaches are looked to as father/mother figures to their players. For me, my coach was like a replacement parent figure. He gave me money if I needed and always made sure I had a way home as well as helped me find other places to play ball when I transferred twice. He also provided me with equipment and advice. When I coached, I adopted a similar philosophy. I took kids home that lived on the rough side of town as well as gave them my contact information for both home and work. I once had to go down and pick a kid up from the police station. He wasn’t in trouble, but knew his dad would beat him to a pulp for even being there. He called me and I took him home and explained that he came over to play video games. He was a good kid. I kept in touch with him when he went to college and we still talk from time to time. But not all of the kids turned out like that. I had one who I attempted to help that told me point blank that he couldn’t get out of the gang, but thanked me for taking an interest in him. 2 years later, I saw him on the news. He had been identified as being one of the leaders of a gang here that terrorized the city for 6 months. I know he got convicted, but not sure how much time he received. That haunts me to this day because I felt like I should have tried to do more to help him.
Is the coach right?
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
True Love Yes or No?
True Love: Yes or No?
A woman sits by her window and stares at the blue sky. She then begins to daydream about the wonderful man that she has been corresponding with. She imagines herself laying next to him, embracing and talking about what the future holds. They lay there for hours watching old movies and feeding each other popcorn. Her dreams never get pass that point because she does not want her vision to be tainted. To her that is perfection.
As the days turn to months and months to years, their fondness of each other grows. After 2 years of swapping emails, they decide to meet. He has arranged for her to fly to Arizona to see him. That day she receives the tickets in the mail and begins to pack. Though the trip is a week away, she wants to make sure that she has everything. The anticipation is driving her crazy, but she finds serenity in knowing that in a few days, she will be in his arms.
The day for her flight comes and she is nervous. She has never left Florida and has never been on a plane. She sits downs, fastens her seatbelt and gets ready for a trip she has waited her whole life for. The flight is nonstop and she arrives in Phoenix 3 hours later. As she steps into the terminal, there is a man waiting for her with a sign that says Tamia. She goes and introduces herself and the man states that he is not Robert, but his driver and that he would be taking her to meet with him. They get her bags and depart the airport for his house.
The ride over to his house is wonderful. Though her folks had money, Tamia had never been in a limo before. It took about 30 minutes to get to his house. When she arrived, she was amazed. Robert's house was huge. He had a private entrance and it was a good mile from the gate to the house. She stepped out of he car and there was a red carpet covered with rose petals that led to the front door. The driver grabbed her bags and led her into the house.
Once inside she was shown her room and told to relax and that she and Robert would be having dinner in about an hour. So during her down time she was both nervous and perplexed. She was wondering why he had flown her out there and yet hadn't even bother to such much as say hello since she had been there. With that withstanding, She was still anxious/nervous about this first meeting.
When she arrives in the dining room she is amazed. Instead of the huge table with lots of chairs, it had the look of a cafe in Paris. It was a small round table, 2 chairs, with fresh flowers and candles. Robert was looking out of the window. She walked up to him and and he turned around. Tamia almost fainted. Roberts face was severely burned and disfigured. He looked at her and asked if he scared her. She said no, but I wasn't expecting this. He then went on to explain that he wanted to know if she liked him as a person and that's why he asked that they never exchange photos. Tamia then said that she was still happy to be there because she felt that their connection was real. She said she did not feel deceived and was happy that she had came. The dinner was roasted duck with a mango salsa and dessert was strawberry cheesecake, her favorite meal. After the dinner, they went for a walk.
During their walk, Tamia begin to ask Robert and he stopped her in mid sentence. He went on to describe how he was an attorney who represented members of organized crime. One morning he woke up and decided that he wanted to do solely pro bono work. He informed his clients. They did not take it well but understood. One his way home, his car lost control and hit a tree and instantly caught on fire. Fortunately a stranger stopped and pulled him out, but he was badly burned. He sued the tire manufacturer and they settled out of court for an undisclosed amount of money. Enough to where his children's children would be millionaires. He then went on to say that even with more money than he could ever spend, he was unhappy until he met her. With that moment, Tamia pulled him close and gave him a kiss on what she assumed was his lips.
After the walk, they set on the balcony of his master bedroom and star gazed. After looking at the stars, they settled in for the evening. He told Tamia that she did not have to sleep with him. She was his guest, not his woman. He said do not feel pressured. I would understand. Tamia said thank you and headed for her room. Once there she changed into her night clothes and returned to his room. She walked into the room with her hair flowing and in a silk nightshirt. Robert welcomed her in and for the rest of the night, they watched old movies until they fell asleep. That morning when she woke up, the first thing she did was grab Robert close. But unusually, he did not move. In fact he wasn't breathing. She called for his servants who quickly came. They tried to revive him, but it was no use. He was dead.
For the rest of the day, Tamia cried. She called her parents and let them know what had happened and to say she was going to stay for the funeral. After she hung up the phone, she noticed that their was a letter on the dresser with her name on it. She opened it up and began to read:
Dear Tamia,
If you are reading this, then I know I have passed on. I wanted you to know that I have been sick for a while and instead of being hooked up to machines for the rest of my life, I decided to stay here and die in peace. I wasn't going to tell you anything, but decided that you do not treat people you love that way and i do love you. So I asked God to allow me to live long enough to meet you and spend some time with you. I only asked for some time because I wasn't sure what to expect once you saw me for the first time. That was my fault for not believing in the power of love and attraction.
So I close by saying, always believe in love and all of its possibilities. We are proof that people who see the invisible, can achieve the impossible.
Love,
Robert
The End
A woman sits by her window and stares at the blue sky. She then begins to daydream about the wonderful man that she has been corresponding with. She imagines herself laying next to him, embracing and talking about what the future holds. They lay there for hours watching old movies and feeding each other popcorn. Her dreams never get pass that point because she does not want her vision to be tainted. To her that is perfection.
As the days turn to months and months to years, their fondness of each other grows. After 2 years of swapping emails, they decide to meet. He has arranged for her to fly to Arizona to see him. That day she receives the tickets in the mail and begins to pack. Though the trip is a week away, she wants to make sure that she has everything. The anticipation is driving her crazy, but she finds serenity in knowing that in a few days, she will be in his arms.
The day for her flight comes and she is nervous. She has never left Florida and has never been on a plane. She sits downs, fastens her seatbelt and gets ready for a trip she has waited her whole life for. The flight is nonstop and she arrives in Phoenix 3 hours later. As she steps into the terminal, there is a man waiting for her with a sign that says Tamia. She goes and introduces herself and the man states that he is not Robert, but his driver and that he would be taking her to meet with him. They get her bags and depart the airport for his house.
The ride over to his house is wonderful. Though her folks had money, Tamia had never been in a limo before. It took about 30 minutes to get to his house. When she arrived, she was amazed. Robert's house was huge. He had a private entrance and it was a good mile from the gate to the house. She stepped out of he car and there was a red carpet covered with rose petals that led to the front door. The driver grabbed her bags and led her into the house.
Once inside she was shown her room and told to relax and that she and Robert would be having dinner in about an hour. So during her down time she was both nervous and perplexed. She was wondering why he had flown her out there and yet hadn't even bother to such much as say hello since she had been there. With that withstanding, She was still anxious/nervous about this first meeting.
When she arrives in the dining room she is amazed. Instead of the huge table with lots of chairs, it had the look of a cafe in Paris. It was a small round table, 2 chairs, with fresh flowers and candles. Robert was looking out of the window. She walked up to him and and he turned around. Tamia almost fainted. Roberts face was severely burned and disfigured. He looked at her and asked if he scared her. She said no, but I wasn't expecting this. He then went on to explain that he wanted to know if she liked him as a person and that's why he asked that they never exchange photos. Tamia then said that she was still happy to be there because she felt that their connection was real. She said she did not feel deceived and was happy that she had came. The dinner was roasted duck with a mango salsa and dessert was strawberry cheesecake, her favorite meal. After the dinner, they went for a walk.
During their walk, Tamia begin to ask Robert and he stopped her in mid sentence. He went on to describe how he was an attorney who represented members of organized crime. One morning he woke up and decided that he wanted to do solely pro bono work. He informed his clients. They did not take it well but understood. One his way home, his car lost control and hit a tree and instantly caught on fire. Fortunately a stranger stopped and pulled him out, but he was badly burned. He sued the tire manufacturer and they settled out of court for an undisclosed amount of money. Enough to where his children's children would be millionaires. He then went on to say that even with more money than he could ever spend, he was unhappy until he met her. With that moment, Tamia pulled him close and gave him a kiss on what she assumed was his lips.
After the walk, they set on the balcony of his master bedroom and star gazed. After looking at the stars, they settled in for the evening. He told Tamia that she did not have to sleep with him. She was his guest, not his woman. He said do not feel pressured. I would understand. Tamia said thank you and headed for her room. Once there she changed into her night clothes and returned to his room. She walked into the room with her hair flowing and in a silk nightshirt. Robert welcomed her in and for the rest of the night, they watched old movies until they fell asleep. That morning when she woke up, the first thing she did was grab Robert close. But unusually, he did not move. In fact he wasn't breathing. She called for his servants who quickly came. They tried to revive him, but it was no use. He was dead.
For the rest of the day, Tamia cried. She called her parents and let them know what had happened and to say she was going to stay for the funeral. After she hung up the phone, she noticed that their was a letter on the dresser with her name on it. She opened it up and began to read:
Dear Tamia,
If you are reading this, then I know I have passed on. I wanted you to know that I have been sick for a while and instead of being hooked up to machines for the rest of my life, I decided to stay here and die in peace. I wasn't going to tell you anything, but decided that you do not treat people you love that way and i do love you. So I asked God to allow me to live long enough to meet you and spend some time with you. I only asked for some time because I wasn't sure what to expect once you saw me for the first time. That was my fault for not believing in the power of love and attraction.
So I close by saying, always believe in love and all of its possibilities. We are proof that people who see the invisible, can achieve the impossible.
Love,
Robert
The End
Indebtedness
I am not sure that my title is really a word, but I thought it was appropriate for my blog.
I got a phone call today from one of my cousins. He did not want anything (which is the norm when folks from my family call me), he just wanted to check up on me to see how I was doing. As the phone call concluded, I told him thanks. He responded with his customary, no need for all that. As I hung up the phone, I reminded how far from the truth that actually was. Without going into a long story, my cousin and I were riding one night and the cops pulled us over. My cousin had over 10 pounds of drugs in his trunk. I honestly had no idea that the drugs were in there. The police took us both to the station and put us in different rooms. I was two weeks from leaving for college and all I could see was my life going down the drain. Before anyone came to talk to me, I was told I could go. My cousin took the weight for the drugs and was sentenced to 5 years. He served 2 1/2. Even if I did not get jail time, the conviction would have made me both ineligible for financial aid and I would have lost my scholarship. By being a stand up guy, he gave me a chance to get my life started and I have never forgotten that. Thanks cuz!
I got a phone call today from one of my cousins. He did not want anything (which is the norm when folks from my family call me), he just wanted to check up on me to see how I was doing. As the phone call concluded, I told him thanks. He responded with his customary, no need for all that. As I hung up the phone, I reminded how far from the truth that actually was. Without going into a long story, my cousin and I were riding one night and the cops pulled us over. My cousin had over 10 pounds of drugs in his trunk. I honestly had no idea that the drugs were in there. The police took us both to the station and put us in different rooms. I was two weeks from leaving for college and all I could see was my life going down the drain. Before anyone came to talk to me, I was told I could go. My cousin took the weight for the drugs and was sentenced to 5 years. He served 2 1/2. Even if I did not get jail time, the conviction would have made me both ineligible for financial aid and I would have lost my scholarship. By being a stand up guy, he gave me a chance to get my life started and I have never forgotten that. Thanks cuz!
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Living the Dream
On November 11, 2008 I, like many African-Americans, went to the polls with the hope of making history. We had followed this Presidential campaign as closely as we had any in our history. In January, we wondered if this would be a rerun of a movie we had seen before. You remember, 1988, charismatic black candidate trying to honor the legacy and dream of Dr. King, only to falter due to lack of experience and gamesmanship. As the months passed by after the Iowa Caucus, we began to see that there was something different about this man who screamed that what we as Americans needed was change. We were not looking at another black man running for the presidency, what we saw was a legitimate candidate who had a real chance to win.
Fast-forward to January 20, 2009. What for a few was just another cold January day in DC, for many was a day that will be forever etched in our minds. The image of Barack Obama with one hand on the bible and one hand raised, one day after the holiday that celebrated his hero, taking the oath to become the 44th President of the United States is one I will never forget. At that moment, I saw a cloud above him and in it played a video of scenes from the Civil Rights movement. But the marches, sit-ins, school desegregation, Rosa Parks at the front of the bus, etc. all had a different look. Instead of anxiety and defiance, the faces were jovial and proud. And right before President Obama repeated the final words of the oath of office, Dr. King put his arm around Coretta and uttered "It's not a dream anymore!"
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